"Well, Liz ... my friend Liz has an emergency and I have to help her." What?" The exasperation could clearly be heard in David's voice.Shelly gave a gentle push on her friend's arm and Bonnie continued."I'm sorry, but I won't be home. I mean, I won't be home until later ... later tonight, that is." Bonnie! Don't you do this to me! What the hell's the matter with you anyway!"He was yelling loud enough that even Shelly could hear him. "Hang up the phone," she whispered softly.Bonnie looked like she was in shock. Shelly quickly grabbed the phone out of her friend's hand and hung it up, thus putting an abrupt end to David's yelling."I hate sniveling assholes who yell a lot," said Shelly in a quiet voice. "Now, you listen to me. I will pick you up right here at five-thirty. That will give you a little time to freshen yourself up a little." But what about David?" Fuck him." Well, what about Sandy?" Your babysitter? Fuck her, too!" But the boys? What about them?" That's David's. When we got to the ship, we found the devious old git waiting for us with his cases. Amid many tears of joy from my wife, he informed us he had nothing on that holiday and thought he may as well join us and have us serve on him hand and foot, seeing as he was a world-famous artist and he was a VIP passenger (according to the ship's passenger list anyway). Of course he was told to "go fuck yourself" by the pair of us, but we did all have a marvellous time together. Josie and I marvelled at the way Archie was able to mix with all the different walks of life on-board a cruise liner. From the richest, snobbiest passenger to the humblest of the crew, he was able to have a laugh and a joke with all of them- usually at himself I might add.He seemed to be constantly asked to join various different groups for dinner, or drinks in the bar, always willing and able to autograph anything they wanted him to, or have his picture taken with them. He was especially in demand by all the middle-aged.
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